| Finding a person with whom you want to establish a committed relationship is hard, but making the relationship lifelong may be even harder. There are no conflict-free relationships. The way in which we deal with these conflict situations will be the determinants of our personalities. Some marriages will deal with harder challenges and this causes them to build up a relationship anew or it forces them to break off. Then there are the families that have large conflicts that happen because of kids becoming teenagers. Regardless of the cause, conflict is inevitable and we all have to face it sooner or later. And to save the relationship we should learn to solve conflicts and work on the relationship using diverse methods.
Evolutionary psychologists examined "mate retention strategies" in American women and men and found these tactics include being overly watchful and threatening violence. Different gender strategies to keep their marriages intact were found out.
To assess attributes admired in partners and how they keep their marriages intact, researchers of the University of Texas assessed 214 married people.
Men, more than ladies, admitted that they exploited their social standing and financial success as a strategy to arouse interest in them, reported the authors. Men also admitted to keep their wives interested by promising changes and threatening sexual betrayal.
Ladies were also more likely than men to take care of their physical appearance as a strategy to arouse interest.
With regard to infidelity, it was found out that if a husband suspected that his wife was having a love affair, he would try and keep his wife from public activities, threaten punishment and criticize other men. Interestingly, women who suspected that their husbands were having a love affair did not work on the marriage any harder than those without suspicions.
Unfortunately, some male strategies included some minor forms of physical abuse of spouses, reported the psychologists. For example, in an earlier survey, 72% of women requiring medical care reported that their husbands limited their contact with family members and friends, wanted to know the ladies' whereabouts and verbally insulted women. |